14 February 2013

When goals give you a roundhouse kick in the gut.

We have spent the last fortnight on excited tenderhooks while we waited to hear back if Husband got the job.

Job? What job?

A really interesting and cool one in another state. We are planning on moving from where we are to Tasmania. It is something that I first touched on here way back in January last year when I lamented about our lack of "village." After long talks with Husband, we decided to take the plunge and make a firm commitment to move to South Tassie. It was cemented further when I went to Hobart for the Homebirth Conference last year and just felt so at home there. By this time, Husband had already started applying for jobs and had been doing so for a few months.

12 months later and we thought the drought had been broken. He got an interview and we all hoped that this was it. The job was perfect: pay, area, everything perfect.

This was shattered in a cut and paste email from a faceless person in their HR department saying "thanks but no thanks."

Gutted. Disillusionment. Defeated. These are the emotions I am feeling. All we want to do is escape this town and move. We can't do this until Husband finds a job. I have tried availing to the universe for good news and to help us. Anything and everything to help propel us towards our goal. Nothing is budging. I feel like a butterfly trapped in a glass jar, battering my wings against the side of it while all the time being able to see the freedom through the transparent cage.

This week I am in a crabby mood. Over it. Had enough. Blah Blah Blah.  Wallowing in a ridiculous amount of self pity.



flight

I just want to take flight.


5 comments:

  1. Sorry to hear that. Do you have family / friends in Tasmania?

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Lila. We have friends down there.

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  2. i am sorry. i know what's like to feel that way. not in that same particular situation but the feeling of being a trapped butterfly. i hope something will soon work out for all of you so you can fly!

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  3. I know this feeling well. I'm also not living in my ideal area for myself and my family, and it often feels like I'm itching to get out and start the "real life" that I want. I hope new opportunities (better ones!) pop up for you soon!

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